i asked for love, i asked for patience, i asked for mercy, but you're already all of these things

tomorrow is my first day of outpatient threapy and i am exciteddd. hoping all goes well, now every week i can add another 10% of weight onto the leg. hoping i can go to warped tour this year, because it would suck if i couldn't.


my mom took me to albany to go shopping and i got a sick new phone, that little pretty on the right. i already downloaded so many new ringtones for it, and it takes awesome pictures and videos and shit. so siked on it. i've never had a cool phone before. everyone get textual with me, because it has a sweet keypad that i love using :) i also got three pairs of acid wash stretch jean, two in gray and one in a teal color, mmm love them.



also, cannot wait for dark knight. 23 days. going to the imax with a few people (including love of my life janine and this new babe i've been talking to, who has a spanish accent, mmm) at the midnight showing. i've been waiting 3 years for this movie, so i am so fucking exciteddd


i also got busy today and made some drawings on illustrator, here they are

me and the love of my life, janine, if we were mermaids

oh and paramore, duh

a sense of heat that i couldn't bare to touch

i don't want to get my hope up, but this could be good. lets hope. eeeeee

can't say i'm sad to see you go

aaah i hate how i can't fall asleep at night, but i love how TBS shows the best movies. i also cannot stop listening to alkaline trio tonight. jeeeez.

also, let me know how you like the new layout. its not so much a layout change, just color and background. but i like it.

i am guilty of this, you should know this

my heart hurts. i hate the way i can feel my throat closing up when i try to hold back tears. i hate that i'm actually feeling pains in my chest. i thought all this was over. i want it all to be over.

please don't get me wrong

seeing sex and the city tonight wasn't the best idea. tomorrow is the day i have not been looking forward to since september. my mom is going to take me out to do things so my mind stays clear, or just focused on something else. i haven't been sad over this in months, and now all of a sudden this one day is throwing me off. what the fuck.

i made this yesterday, yeahp.

happy birthday to me

too tired to really update right now, but had an amazing birthday and had a surprise party thrown for me today, i love my friends and my mom.

and brandon gave me this for my birthday


easily the best gift ever.

late dawns and early sunsets

the past few days have been good, saturday jackee and eileen came to see me and stayed for a few hours, and that was really nice. we watched the fugitive and talked about how harrison ford can really do anything. then yesterday janine and matt basically spent the entire day with me, and jacci stopped by too. it was really nice to talk to her, because she went through the same thing as me, so she knows exactly what i'm going through. we watched a few movies, and went out on the patio and watched all the animals outside. it was fun. and tomorrow molly and ace are coming over with the babyyy, i cannot wait to see the beautiful bundle of joy for the first time.

seeing all those people made me feel a lot better. i'm also starting to do a lot of things on my own, and i'm now able to lift my leg on my own. its crazy the amount of progress i've made. i can even get up and go to the bathroom on my own if the walker is in reach haha. i've even managed to kind of sleep on my side, which is also wonderful.

for the past three days i haven't been able to stop listening to lights, i love it. its so cute and makes me feel good. i can't find the other songs she has besides the ones on her EP, and the only way i could get those is from ripping them from youtube videos haha. butt since the girl is so cute, i made a graphic of her. sorry i didn't post any for the past two days, i had people over durning the time i usually make them haha

view full size please!